Monday, December 17, 2007

It Starts...

As preparation for the birth I'm trying to sort out some sort of network of gay parents in London. You'd think with the wonders of Google and Facebook it won't be a problem to find many gay parents in London, but you'd be surprised. Only one person joined my Facebook group and she's only thinking about becoming a parent for the time being. It's been just the two of us for the last few months.

I took a calculated risk and posted on a general parenting forum and asked them what do they suggest I should do. Two posters, who are apparently the forums' local clowns, started making rude and inappropriate gay jokes. Another poster made the ignorant comment that I should get to know people first and only then confide in them that I'm gay as if that's some kind of secret and someone else voiced serious concern for the safety of my kids being raised with gay parents (due to society's reaction, rather than our specific parenting skills). I wonder if he would advise black people not to have children too in case they'll have to face racism as they grow up...

That little interaction was a bit depressing, but also eye opening. This is exactly the kind of crap I should be bracing myself for. And this is exactly why it'll be nice to have the support of people in the neighbourhood who go through something similar.

It's going to be one heck of a ride...


Monday, October 01, 2007


I've created a Facebook group for Gay Parents in London. Not sure how many people will join...

I'm not sure how many people will join, but we'll see.

On further reflection, I decided that I don't really don't have that much to say as a father to be... So I might go quiet again for awhile until the birth.

I might still post about other things... We'll see. Like I said, play it by ear.



I never treated my blog as personal diary where I write intimiate things. Mostly because of the fact that it's not a personal diary. This is something that is available on-line for anyone to read. I'm not going to discuss personal problems or issues because I simply don't want to.

So here I go and discuss our pergnancy and wedding. Are these things personal? Of course they are. So why am I doing it?

I'm doing this to raise awareness about the issue. Spread the word. Let other gay people know that they can and should go for it if they want a family. I hope that by sharing out experiences we will also be able to educate many straight people who don't really know gay people and the unique problems they face. That's pretty much it.

I'm still going to draw some lines and not share everything. Where exactly? I'll just play it by ear.


Saturday, September 29, 2007

Holy crap, we're pregnant.

We're pregnant. We are now actually pregnant. The start of a new life is always amazing, but it is even more so when you never really think it will happen to you.

Being gay I never really knew what the future will bring. There aren't that many gay role models for young gay people to look up to, certainly not many that have their own family and children. Being gay, you kinda think that is the sort of priviledge kept for straight people. When I was a teenager my plan was to come out of the closet once my mother passed away. The idea that I will be openly gay and bring my partner home to meet my parents was as real to me as becoming a rock star. And now I'm going to become a father and get married... That is the sort of thing that makes me genuinly believe that's absolutely anything can happen. Well, except for becoming a rock star (though I might just about pass through one stage on X-Factor).

This hasn't really sunk in yet, to be honest. I keep telling myself that in a few months a new human being will join our family and life will never ever be the same again.

I haven't been writing at all in my blog this year because I didn't have much to write about. Most of the interesting things I was going through were some drama at work and outside and various projects I can't discuss on my blog due to confidentiality and common sense. Though with a baby on the way, all those "exciting" things suddenly look so unimportant and silly.

Being a gay couple having our own biological children we'll be facing many unique obstacles and problems over the next few years and I think it'll be nice to share those concerns and worries (and hopefully solutions).

We've only started on our path and I'll be doing some catch up with what we've been through so far in the next few posts.

Pregnant. Wow. I keep repeating that enough times, it might eventually really sink in!


Monday, January 29, 2007

Blame World of Warcraft!

Clips from the Tyra Banks show regarding a World of Warcraft addict.

Man, watching that pissed me off a little.

I got The Burning Crusade a few weeks ago and I was playing it quite a bit over the last few weeks, pretty much abandoning all my other games. But that's not unique, the same happens often when I get a great game that sucks me in (Kingdom Hearts 2, Metroid Prime, Resident Evil 4 and so on). I still went out to meet people, spent time watching TV with my partner, going to the gym and taking care of my dogs.

The whole videoclip was just so partonizing and crap television. Tyra doesn't even know what the game is about. WoW isn't just a game, you play it with other people and that makes it a social activity. It doesn't justify playing 40+ weekly hours, but know what you're talking about.

The magical solution of shredding the discs is such a joke. For one thing, once installed, you don't need to have the original discs to play (again, know what you're talking about) and nothing stops the guy from buying the game again or borrowing discs from friends to re-install it. Obviously the problems in that relationship goes much deeper than just the game and if the guy has an addictive personality and a desire to escape his real-life responsibilities, he'll find something else to get addicted to. It kinda brings to mind the song "Blame Canada" from the South Park movie.

For example, he can get addicted to watching crappy chat shows that offer magical solutions to complex problems. I never watch that show, but can someone please enlighten me and tell me if Tyra ever did a show about guys who want to leave their girlfriends because they watch too many soaps and talk shows? I wouldn't imagine she would want to piss off her main demographic!


Tuesday, January 23, 2007

How I Didn't Break into the Comics Industry Part 1

As we grow older we realize that many other people have very similar dreams and fears and it's both comforting and disturbing. It's nice to know other people struggle with the same problems, but if they have similar goals doesn't that make them your, at least indirect, competition?

In 1996 I discovered the internet. It was a prehistortic forefather of today's information highway monster, but mind blowing nonetheless. It was such a delight to log into a chat room and chat to a girl from Sweden or curiously check a sex chat and be asked politley by a stranger what breed is my dog and if he can have sex with him. Suddenly there was this magical little gateway that allowed me to transfer my mind around the world and talk to people anywhere in the world touched by modern science.

While in real life I knew only a handful of people who read superhero comics. suddenly I could discuss it with American readers, the main market for this genre. My English was a bit broken, but not worse than most foreigners' who were trudging the web for the first time in those early days. My English was good enough to understand and be understood and during those chats and e-mail exchanges I improved my English language skills far faster and better than I ever did in highschool. This wasn't some dry textbook, this was the real thing with real people talking the way real people talked in the 90's.

In 1996 my highschool major was Theatre and I was a member at two different theatre groups. I viewed myself mostly as an actor, but at the same time I was also very passionate about writing. That was when I realized I wasn't alone. There were others who wanted to be writers. I sort of knew that already, that there will be fierce competition in any artform I will choose to pursue, but suddenly, with the wonders of technology, the truth was laid bare in front of me. The worrying part was that I thought some of these writers were really good (I wouldn't go as far as saying "better than me" to preserve my selfesteem). Not only technically with better grammar and spelling, but the actual ideas and storytelling.

The biggest shock, though, was to suddenly meet comics creators on those various message boards. People who were nothing more than names in credit boxes in my favourite comicbooks were suddenly hanging around on the same messageboard as me and answering my questions. Most didn't even bother to hide their e-mail addresses and were very kind and patient to answer most of the e-mails they were sent. There were quite a few of them, but the ones that stick to mind were Peter David, Karl Kesel and Todd Dezago. I was starstruck and very happy. Realizing that there were real people behind the stories strenghened my that that's what I also want to do. Writing comics was an actual job.

During my first year in London I went to a foundation drama school. I wasn't accepted to any of the three year courses I applied to (I'd like to believe because I never managed to get rid of my Israeli accent, just make it sound even funnier). This was a requirement to get an equity card and start working in the UK as a proffesional actor. As my twelve steps plan to win an Oscar by the age of thirty was beginning to fall apart I decided to try very hard to break into the comics industry as a writer. Little did I know that I was moving from one illusive goal to a far worse one. You see, there are far fewer wannabe comicbook writers than wannabe actors, but there were even fewer positions for comicbook writers than there are for actors.

As of writing this, nearly a decade later, I'm yet to win an Oscar or see my name on the cover of a mass marketed comicbook. But it was an interesting ride that hopefully isn't over yet.


I'm baaack. Sort of.

Been a while, wasn't it? Not that I think anyone was reading this blog regularly anyway. I'm writing it mostly for myself, at least for the moment.

I was writing this blog and the Puppy Love comicstrips as a way to keep practicing, to make sure I write on a regular basis. That stopped when I started working very hard on a real project I can't talk about yet. Suddenly I didn't need to practice as I was doing the real thing.

But since it can fall apart at any moment, I can't talk about it yet. When it's announced properly or falls flat on its face, that's when I'll be able to share.

So the most exciting thing that's going on in my life is something I can't talk about. This does not bode well for a blog, now does it?

So instead I'll do something I was thinking about doing for a long time, but never got around to do. Write about all my past attempts at breaking into the comics industry and various other related anecdotes. While nothing spectacular, these are fun little stories that some people might find interesting and I would like to write down. I could only call it "How I Didn't Break Into the Comics Industry (Yet)".